These episodes happen when my information or stimulation input becomes so intensely overwhelming that I am completely unable to function or interact with anyone. Again, they are painful, scary, isolating, and sometimes dangerous. But, they are not something I do intentionally, or for attention. I hate them as much as you do. I just wish some people would make an effort to understand it.
2 days prior
- My child wet the bed.
- I was not heard when expressing an issue
- I was told something that invalidated one of my serious issues.
The Day Before
- My child threw several loud fits during the day
- I went shopping and had a lot of new input
- My child cried for two hours over pain in his teeth
The Day Of
- I overslept and did not keep my routine
- I didn't manage to eat early
- Didn't get my chore done, and could not get the energy to do it.
- Live-in person verbally triggered guilt over the unfinished chore
- An argument
- And then the meltdown
Here are the symptoms displayed leading up to the explosive episode, that must be noted.
Two Days Prior
- Mild stress communicated
- Less physically functional
- Increase in irritability.
The Day Before
- More difficulty functioning
- Somewhat more irritable
- Distant from everyone
The Day Of
- before the "Rumblings" really started -
- Depressed behavior (bedlock, sullenness, tiredness, distraction)
- Lack of interest in group activities
- Mild frustration with environment.
- during the rumblings -
- Aggressive behavior
- Vocal agitation
- Difficulty staying on task
- when the alarm behaviors started -
- Hands held close to my person, twitching.
- Pacing around the house
- Angry vocalizing
- Defensive behavior
- During the actual meltdown -
- Yelling
- Crying
- Escaping
- Demanding
- Hardcore stimming (rocking, touching my arms, pulling my hair)
- Seriously aggressive behavior
- Repetitive language
- Showy aggressive activity
This is what happened and how I got to the Meltdown level in my Autism.
Peace, Love, and Bulletproof Marshmallows
Mandey T
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